Monday, January 26, 2004
I've never understood exactly what this means, and I think the following, from August J. Pollak (via Atrios), shows how stupid it is:|
Helpful hints for Howard DeanI feel no need to comment on this.
The silliness of Howard Dean’s post-Iowa antics have officially gone from a funny late-night joke to a sole excuse for media pundits to claim that "Dean’s campaign is done." "Would you want to see that man with is finger on the nuclear button?" asked Pat Buchanan, Joe Scarborough, etc.
So, since such a gaffe is a clear indicator that Dean is truly unfit to be the leader of the free world, here’s a helpful list of things Dean can do to remove the image that he is a bumbling, inexperienced, lackluster example of leadership:
1) Announce proudly that no president has ever done as much as him for human rights.
2) Dress up in a crotch-accentuating flight suit and land a jet on an aircraft carrier.
3) Brag repeatedly about a sub-standard college grade point average.
4) Get arrested for public rowdiness at a football game.
5) Attempt to recite a cliché adage at a press conference and promptly forget how it goes in the middle of saying it.
6) Mount, and promptly fall off, an unpowered Segway scooter.
7) Drop his dog in front of cameras.
8) Consistently mispronounce the word "nuclear."
9) Condescendingly mock the upcoming execution of a death row inmate.
10) Trade away Sammy Sosa.
11) Choke on pretzel bits to the point of losing balance and bruising his head.
12) Attend a public event in which Stevie Wonder is performing and wave to him from the balcony.
Hopefully, Dr. Dean can get a few of these confidence-gaining moves in before the New Hampshire primary. After all, image is everything.
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